Well, if that were true, then why do babies need so much "equipment"? As we've been gathering baby stuffs from garage sales and friends it is a bit overwhelming just how much "stuff" we think a baby needs. Legitimately, we need a crib and somewhere to store clothing. But the rest? Why can't we change the baby on the floor? Do they really need a bouncy seat? An activity yard/tummy time mat? A swing? Carseat/stroller? Not only do these things cost a lot of money (new) but they also take up a ton of space in your house.
I started thinking about babies born in 3rd world countries. What do they need? They are raised with next to nothing. So all of the 'baby equipment' is really just part of the consumerism of the developed nations? Cultures that make a huge deal out of the "first" baby (and sometimes the second and third ones get showers too, totally do not get that at all) spend a lot of money supporting the baby industry. And it just makes me wonder. What is it all for? I've come up against this time and again as we've been discussing the design for our nursery. In the end, the baby doesn't care. Its the adults that are obsessed with style and colors and making everything cute and perfect. Why do we need to make it "look" so good? We do we care what other people think?
And the answer is, because its programmed into our brains to care. I am married to an artist and he cares A LOT about how the nursery is going to look. Much more than I do. We have bought some baby gear for good prices at garage sales and from Craig's List and will continue to receive donated and borrowed cothing/gear from friends and family. In two weeks time we will probably make our registry for the items we desire to have new.
Back to babies in 3rd world countries. It is important to note that those babies don't always develop normally. In Bolivia and many other cultures, native women wrap their infants tightly in cloths and carry them sling like on their backs for the majority of the day. These babies can end up having poorly developed muscles and joints since they haven't been able to move around. They only get good nutrients from being breastfeed if the mother has good nutrition which is not very often. So babies of developed nations probably do have healthier and stronger, well developed babies. But the consumerism is still sickening when you look at a baby gear warehouse like babies R us or buy buy baby.
So we go forward with getting ready for this little one to arrive in Feb trying to only buy what is really needed for the child. And that involves entertainment and education as well as safety. Which still ends up being a lot. Oh well.
Very true that the baby corner of the market has gotten far out of hand! We bought only cloth diapers and a crib mattress new... then we waited, researched, borrowed, etc before buying.
ReplyDeleteHere are some links you may enjoy on brain development. That helps me know which items are truly developmentally needed (seriously, some bouncers over stimulate me, as an adult!).
http://www.zerotothree.org/child-development/brain-development/baby-brain-map.html
http://www.zerotothree.org/child-development/brain-development/healthy-minds.html
This is an organization that works to build successful parents (and works with the parents' culture of origin). Here are some of their progress/outcome measurement tools:
http://www.parentsasteachers.org/images/stories/documents/Outcomes_Measurement_Tools_rev.pdf
Personally, what helps me the most as a parent is prayer, and using one measurement: to demonstrate Christ-likeness and help my child grow in Christ-likeness :-)
Well, it also amazes me how recently a lot of the stuff has become a "must-have" in the baby world. I can tell you, we didn't have space for a lot of the stuff in our condo in Aurora, and A is doing just fine. Most of the time the teachers are amazed at what she can do. We did a lot of what would be called "Montesorri" in terms of development -- sorting silverware or clothes into different colored piles instead of shapes and to this day there is very little tolerance for A and toys.
ReplyDeleteDon't be scared to go with your gut (you'll do that a lot as a parent) and not be depressed if you don't have "everything" that society says you need.